WHO AM I?

A lot of times when I am sitting alone a voice from inside calls out to me and every time it poses a question, "Do I know the real me?" And every time I can't find an exact answer.

Each one of us is born with certain qualities or interests which define our individuality, which separates I from WE. Some of us are artists, some are sportspersons, some like to play with numbers, some of us want to explore the science behind everything, some are explorers. The list is endless, but everyone has their individual trait which separates them from the rest of the world. It is an individual world within this huge world where we are most happy. But how many of us get to live in this world of ours throughout our lives?

We may be rich, successful, powerful, surrounded by a loving family and friends but don't we all have a moment when we look at a painting, watch a match, look at a beautiful picture, watch an actor perform, and we want to be the person doing those things. That is the real you. But then who is the person standing in the mirror staring at us everyday? This is the question that we are trying to find an answer to here.

When God created Man, he must have thought, "this is my most beautiful creation. Now, what can I do to make it superior to everything else that I have created so far?" At that moment he gave the man the boon of FREE WILL. But we humans in our greed for power and in our quest for control, created Society, the biggest roadblock to the free will. With the creation of society and its rules and measurements where the successes and failures of its members were judged against set parameters, humans slowly lost the boon of free will. Everyone started to mold his/her life to meet the requirements of those parameters, to be counted amongst the successful. No one wanted to be called a failure because the place for failures was at the bottom of the social hierarchy. And this process has continued ever since.

Even today, most of us are aspiring to be successful. And very few of us aspire to be Happy. The question arises, that isn't being successful at something, makes you happy? The answer is Yes and No. The mantra for success is dedication, hard work, smart thinking, and a positive approach. But being happy with that work never features in the criteria for success. There can be numerous motivations, like money, fame, power, etc. And they are indeed very powerful ones. But they cannot guarantee happiness. Because success is not a pre-condition for happiness, as sometimes even our failures make us happy by giving you an opportunity to keep doing something that you love to do.

Then comes the next question. If even failure can make us happy in doing something that we love to do, then why don't we keep doing it? There can be many reasons. Most of the time, we are just trying to please others, rather than looking for our own happiness. In order to be seen as a successful person in the eyes of our parents, siblings, peers, friends, and spouses, we start suppressing our real identity and wrap ourselves with a blanket of socially acceptable image. An aspiring chef becomes a computer engineer where instead of designing menus for restaurants he designs new software, an actor becomes a doctor, a musician becomes a bureaucrat, and so on. But, not everyone is doing this for others. Some of us do it under the pressure of social reflectors. Sometimes we mistake success, money, and power with happiness, and kill our dreams to start living in virtual reality.

So what do we do? Should we squander everything that we have achieved after a lot of struggle and hard work, and start running after a dream that may well turn out to be a wild goose chase? I would say that although the mantra for a happy life is to be true to yourself, where you have no inhibitions, and where you are not affected by success and failure. But that life will be a life of a social outcast i.e. you would have to go out of the range of social parameters. And when you do something that you like, success is not a guarantee. The only thing that is guaranteed is Happiness. Not every artist can be Michelangelo, not every sportsman can be Sachin Tendulkar, not every scientist can be Albert Einstein. But if you really love what you do, success or no success, you will enjoy every second of your life.

But since it is not possible for most of us to break the shackles of social order, the least we can do to ensure that the real ME in all of us does not die. We have to give it another chance, to live again. For at least some time in a day or a day in a week or a week in a month or a month in a year, we should let our real self come out, not for anyone but for us. We should indulge in something that gives us happiness. We may be good at it or may not be good at it, but that I should not be stopped from trying. This would give us a chance to be happy with ourselves. We may not achieve 100% happiness but those times would give us ample happiness to power us through the rest of our lives.

But this can only be achieved once we have access to our true self. Once we know what we really want to be, what gives us happiness, and what is it that we want to do? The answer to these questions lies in our childhood. Go back to the days when you were children and see for yourself, what was it that you really enjoyed, what got you excited and what you liked to do? You will meet the real you there. So take a moment from your busy lives, sit back, relax, close your eyes, and ask your childhood, WHO AM I? The child in you would take you back to the time when you were happiest in your life. Grab that moment and keep holding on to it.

I am not sure if I have been able to touch a chord in you or not. Because I don't know if the person reading this is the one whom everyone knows, or the real you. But if it is not the real you, time to ring the bell and ask your self, Hey! Do I know you?